Repression
by DapperCrapper
Summary: Premanga. Exactly how did Yumiko's Yumie come to exist in Yumiko's psyche? What events led up to the creation of her alter ego? Oneshot


A/N: I always wondered, where did Yumiko's 'Yumie' come from? What happened the first time she came out when her glasses slipped? I don't know much about Yumiko's family so I'm making this up. Don't hang me. This is a very dark fic, not the cheery stuff I usually write... and I had fun writing it.

Rating: R or... M whichever you like.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing in anyway, shape or form. It belongs to Kouta Hirano, a man much talented than I ever hope to be... Cries in dissapointment. 

_Repression_

; 

"See you tomorrow, Yumiko-chan!"

"Bye, Akiko-chan!"

Small feet ran down the streets of Tokyo Japan away from the playground where the young girl frequently played with her friends. Her raven-wing pig-tails flew gracefully behind her as she skidded to a stop only to turn and run up the stairs of the apartment complex, stopping at the door of the flat she called home.

"Mother, I'm home!"

"Yumiko, why are you so late?" came the harsh whisper of the older woman as she gave her daughter an angry yet fearful stare.

"I apologize, Mother" the ten year-old said softly, voice laced with sorrow. "I was playing with Akiko-chan"

Her mother's gaze soften a bit. "Well, hurry and get to your room before your step-father gets home"

Yumiko nodded and pushed up the circular lenses that had started to slide down her nose before taking off down the hall towards her room. Closing the door behind her quietly and leaning upon it, Yumiko set her brown school bag on the floor and sighed.

_Things were much better before Mother married_ him.

A small smile crossing her lips, the little girl recalled how her life had been when her natural father was alive and everything was well. Tagaki Shuya was a very kind and decent man, as well as successful. He was one of the top accountants at his firm. She remembered how her mother would go on about how he would one day become a partner in the firm. But, not only was he succussful, he was devoted to his family.

She along with her parents would spend the nights happily together, going on all sorts of fine trips. She had even went to Italy once! During the entire trip she had rambled on and on about how she would like to live there one day. Her father smiled and said "Maybe you will, one day"

_One day..._

Yumiko vowed that one day she would leave Japan and go to Italy, or Berlin, anywhere but here. The city that was once her happy home was no more. Now, it only held painful memories and an obviously painful future ever since her father died.

Soft brown eyes squinched in pain as the small girl tried to fight off the memories. The sound of the telephone ringing, her mother screaming, telling whoever it was at the end of the line that it couldn't be true, the cold rain hitting her face as she watched them lower her father's coffin into the ground.

"Megumi! Where the Hell is dinner?"

Yumiko was jolted out of her painful reminisces by the sound of her step-father's voice booming through the house like apocalyptic thunder. By the slight slurring of his voice, Yumiko could tell he was drunk, that and the stench of it wafting its' way into her room. The thundering of his heavy footsteps boomed through the small apartment as well as the slight tapping of her mother's footsteps as she more than likely backed away from him.

"I said where the Hell is dinner?"

"I-it's..." her mother began. "It's almost ready, just give me a few-"

**THWACK!**

"Ahh!"

Yumiko's eyes widened when she heard the unmistakeable sound of open palm hitting soft cheek as well as her mother's scream and then the sickening thud as she collidied to the floor. Her hands clenched as fury welled in her chest. The bastard! How dare he do that to her!

"You bitch! When I come home, I expect dinner on the table!" Mashu yelled, each word punctuated by the sound of his hand slapping Megumi over and over. 

"I'm sorry!" the woman screamed. "It just took longer than I expected..." her words were laced with fear as well as sobs.

"No excuses!" another slap. "Where's that little bitch daughter of yours?"

Apparently he hadn't waited for an answer because she could hear his heavy footsteps making their way toward her room. Yumiko didn't even get to move away from the door when he kicked it open, sending her flying across the room, her head cracking against the wooden post of her twin-sized bed.

"Little bitch, you're plenty old enough! Why didn't you cook!" he growled as he picked her up by her blue t-shirt.

Normally, Yumiko would cry and cower under her step-father's heated, drunken glare but her anger from what he did to her mother had not died down because if it had she would have never responded as she did this time.

"If you're so hungry, cook for your damn self!" she spat.

Blood-shot eyes widened in shock and then hooded over with fury as Mashu rose his hand a slapped Yumiko across the face. He expected her to scream, which she did. He expected her to cry, which she did. What he didn't expect was the pain in his knee when she kicked him in the knee cap and then in his arm as she closed her mouth over his wrist and bit down hard, hard enough to draw blood. In his shock, he dropped her and she scurried out of the room as fast as her young legs could carry her.

"Mother! Run!" she yelled as she ran towards the door, only to scream as she was roughly yanked back by one of her pigtails.

"Mashu! Please, let her go!" Her mother begged from her spot on the living room floor.

"You see what this bitch did to me!" the tall man yelled, holding up his bleeding left arm as evidence as he held onto her hair with his right. He let go of her hair and spun her around, back-handing her across the face, sending her flying across the floor. She tried to scramble away but he pressed her down to the floor with his foot.

Megumi rose to her feet, maternal instincts flaring and rushed towards him in an attempt to save her only child but was horribly out-matched. He grabbed her small wrists with his big hands and twisted roughly, making her cry out in pain. He then reared his fists back and socked her in the face before throwing her into a wall, knocking her unconscious.

"Stupid bitch..." he muttered as he turned his full attention on the girl under his foot. "And you..." he pulled her up by the hair and tossed her onto the couch. "You need a lesson in repsect!" he moved toward her and her eyes widened in fear behind her lenses.

"Get away from me!" she yelled only to scream as his hand shot forward and wrapped around her throat. "Let go!"

"Shut up!" he yelled as he climbed on top of her. "You're plenty old enough to learn the only damn thing women are good for, you little bitch!"

"NO!" the small girl screamed and cried as he pulled at her beige pants with one hand and her shirt with the other.

No, this can't be happening! This can't be happening! I can't let it... I WON'T!

Yumiko screamed and struggled harder underneath him, trying to throw his heavy weight from atop her. He paid no attention to her cries as he tried to remove her clothing. In the midst of her struggling, her glasses fell from her face. As the lenses slid from her eyes, it was like something inside of her had also slid away from her. Her weakness, her fear, her humanity, everything that would have stopped her from trying to save herself was gone, leaving only blinding rage.

"Bastard! Get the fuck off of me!"

With renewed strength, she managed to ger her legs free and deliver a punishing blow to his groin with her knee. Mashu doubled over in pain, clutching at his bruised privates, falling to the floor and rolling onto his back. Yumiko wasted no time in getting free from him and then unleashing all of her fury on the bastard that caused her and her mother so much pain. She climbed on top of him and pucnhed him repeatedly in the face, words she never dared used before punctuated each blow she landed upon him.

"God damnit! Mother fucker! Son of bitch! It's about time you got what you deserved!"

Mashu's slowly began relize he was getting the shit beat out of him by a small girl and retaliated. He gripped her by the waist and threw her off of him. She fell but got back to her feet quicker than he expected her to.

"Stupid little bitch! You're going to pay for that!"

She knew that she was physically no match for the taller, stronger man. Firey brown eyes scanned the room for anything she could use against him.

_Plant, no can't get to it quick enough... Vase, no it's too far away... Aha!_

It gleamed on the wall like a beacon, beconing for her to come for it. Her father's katana. Her had told her it was passed down from generation to generation. He had always told her it would be hers one day...

_Why not now?_

Quick as a cat, she ran to the wall and pulled it down from it's stand, unsheathing it and holding it in front of her, her eyes flashed. "Come any closer and I'll slice your head off!"

Mashu snorted and foolishly made his way toward her. "Stupid little whore, you won't do it... You don't have the ba-"

"Shut up!"

She swinged the sword, much like she would her baseball bat when she played with her few male friends and severed his head in one clean stroke. His head flew off, hitting the wall only to roll to the floor, leaving a bloody trail as blood spewed everywhere, splattering Yumiko's face and clothing as well as her mother's unconscious body as Mashu's dead weight fell forward. Yumiko's flicked to her step-father's severed head and she smirked.

"You're not talking anymore shit now, are you?" she asked and got no response.

Her uper lip curled in disgust and she raised the sword again, gouging it unto the severed head's eye, sending more blood splattering. Her mouth was curled upwards in grim satisfaction as she recalled the look on his face, even as his head rolled across the floor toward her feet before she slashed his eye. His last thoughts were written all over his face. He couldn't believe it.

_Where... am I? What happened? Mashu... Yumiko... Yumiko!_

Megumi shot upwards in a sitting position when she finally regained consciousness. She ignored the throbbing in her cheek as well as her skull as she pulled her self to her feet. Something was not right. It was terribly quiet and the stench of blood was so thick even she could smell it. Had Mashu harmed her daughter?

"Yumiko!" she called.

"Right here, mom"

Megumi turned around and screeched at the sight before her. Mashu's dismembered body bleeding on her pure white carpet and her daughter, covered in blood with her father's katana in her hand with Mashu's head still attached to the tip by his eye-socket and grimly satisfied look on Yumiko's pretty face.

"Yumiko..."

"Hmm?" the young girl asked as if nothing was wrong. She eyed her mother for a moment and sighed. "I'm tired and my eyes are starting to hurt from not wearing my glasses..." she let go of the sword, letting it fall to the floor. She bent over to the couch and picked up her fallen leanses, placing them on her face.

As they slid in place, realization hit her. It was like her humanity had come back with her glasses. Her mouth fell open in horror and and her eyes widened.

"Oh my God... I-" she could not deal with the horror of it all and she fainted, her small body falling on the couch.

Megumi bent down and grasped the sword's handle, gently stroking it for a moment and then slowly made her way towards her fallen daughter and sat down, pulling the girl into her lap. "Yumiko... you didn't do this. I did. I did this the minute I married that bastard... I'm sorry I put you through this..." she whispered as she stroked the girl's pale cheek.

"Police! Open the door!"

Megumi paid no heed to the bamming of the door or it being kicked in by the three officers. The three men and one woman looked at the scene in awe, revulsion and horror. "Ma'am, what happened? Who did this?" the female asked.

Megumi rose from the couch and sighed. "I did"

Megumi was placed under arrest. She was tried and was determined innocent by cause of temporary insanity. There were several witnesses who testified on her behalf, including two women who had managed to get away from him. It was concluded that Kasuga Mashu was a batterer of women as well as a rapist. The fact that his pants were opened and Yumiko's slightly ripped clothes more than proved what he was capable of.

Although determined innocent, she could not handle the trauma of what had transpired and a few months afterwards, she had committed suicide. Her body was found by her daughter in the kitchen, a gaping wound in her chest and butcher knife in her left hand. On the kitchen floor, she had written in her own blood: I'm sorry, Yumiko. Be strong.

Yumiko had fainted after the ordeal and then fell into a coma. When she had woken up, she had no conscious memory of what had transpired over the last five months. It was as if she repressed everything. She had been sent to live with her natural father's brother and his wife, who was Italian, in Rome Italy. She had finally gotten away.

In Italy she had been converted to Catholism and led a happy life going to Catholic school then joining a convent. She devoted her life to God, serving the Lord and the Mother Church.

As for her memories, well, somethings can't be contained forever. The rage of her childhood, being contained for so long, took on a life of its own. It stayed dormant most of the time, like an earthquake or volcano, but like earthquakes and volcano, all it need was an opening, a fault. Her doctors thought it would be something huge, like an intense expreience bringing it all back, nt something as simple as her glasses falling from her face.

Well, what'd you guys think? Liked it? Hated it? I should stop writing and become a nun? Please review? All is welcome... even flames...


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